How To Have A Positive Birth Experience (in any scenario!)

Every expectant mum I know longs to have a positive birth story. This desire is valid because birth is honestly one of the scariest things women go through.

I’ve had two births and I can sincerely say they were both incredible! However, one was even more magical than the other.

I’ll explain what I mean by that, later on. But first, what is a positive birth story?

Quick Peek Inside

What Is A Positive Birth Story?

A positive birth story is a birth that leaves the mother feeling empowered, happy and content with the process she went through to bring her baby into the world.

I, unlike some, believe that no matter the type of birth you had, it can be positive.

In essence, regardless of the way, your baby was born – Caesarean Section, assisted delivery with forceps or ventouse, medicated birth with epidural, it can still be termed as a positive birth.

My point is your birth doesn’t have to be vaginal to be amazing!

It all depends on how the entire process left you feeling.

If you felt at peace, you were being listened to, your preferred options were considered, you understood what was happening and you were properly carried along, you felt in control of your body, you and your baby are safe and healthy – you would feel like you had a positive birth even if things didn’t go 100% the way you taught it would.

Like I mentioned earlier, my first and second births were lovely experiences for me but more so my second.

Today, I would like to share 7 things that helped me enjoy amazing birth experiences with both kids.

I’m sharing this in hopes that you too can have the most magical experience of giving birth.

Please note that this article may contain affiliate links. You can read my full disclosure at the bottom of this page.

7 TIPS FOR A POSITIVE BIRTH EXPERIENCE

#1. Be flexible with your birth plan

Every mum-to-be has an idealised way she’d prefer to give birth.

Some women want a natural birth, others a medicated birth. Still, some want to give birth in a hospital, several consider a birth centre and yet some expectant mums want to have a home birth.

There are so many choices these days when it comes to birth. Unfortunately, many, many times, birth is unpredictable!

You do NOT have full control over the process of birth and you can’t necessarily foresee how it will go (well, unless, you’re some sort of prophetess or something!)

I must mention here that even though you don’t have absolute control over what happens during birth, you can still feel in control of how your body responds to labour.

As a result, it’s always a good idea to write a birth plan but keep it flexible.

The birth plan should act as a guide for your midwives, L&D nurses or Oby-Gyn.

Having an open mind to birth is very crucial.

Such that, if things do not go to plan, you are not so upset about it that it ruins your birth story.

My Positive Epidural Birth Story

Towards the end of my first pregnancy, my midwife observed that my baby was measuring small.

To be certain, she sent us for scans. The scans confirmed that my baby was indeed measuring small and I was booked for an induction. I honestly wasn’t bothered by the induction.

I wanted my baby out safe.

My only fear was coping with the pain. By the time I got to the hospital, I was already 2cm dilated, having contractions and in early labour. So, I didn’t need the induction anymore.

But more was to come…

As each contraction intensified and peaked, my baby was in distress. So, I was prepped for CS. I wanted a natural birth but was open-minded about it.

So, when the midwives came to explain to me that I might have an emergency CS, I honestly wasn’t bothered, especially knowing my baby was in some sort of distress. I wanted him out and safe.

Eventually, the maternity team was able to keep my baby inside with constant monitoring. I took an epidural, relaxed with my spontaneous labour playlist (a story for another time) and waited till my baby was born.
Were there a few hiccups along the way? You bet!

Twice, the midwife had to ring the alarms to get the whole team rushing in when they couldn’t hear my baby’s heartbeat. He was born eventually with forceps delivery and I had an episiotomy and had his umbilical cord around his neck (which caused the distress).

My son also went to a special care unit for a few hours. Despite all these interventions and things not going to plan, every time I look back at my son’s birth, I consider it an amazing birth partly because I was open-minded and also because of my next point.

#2. Learn about birth

positive natural birth stories - prenatal class

In short, take an antenatal class, prenatal class or birthing class. They all mean the same thing.

An antenatal class is one where qualified health personnel explains in detail what happens during the 3 stages of labour, how to minimize pain and how your partner can help make things comfortable for you during childbirth.

Like I mentioned in my previous point, taking a prenatal class was key to me having a lovely birth experience.

My husband and I took the free NHS antenatal class in my local hospital. It was good enough to prepare me for what happens if any complications arise during birth (but it wasn’t GREAT).

In hindsight, there were so many other things I wish were covered in the classes that if I could do it over again, I would take a better paid prenatal online class.

Learning about what to expect during labour and delivery is a great way to develop confidence about your birth experience.

This way things won’t take you by surprise and also you would know the birth options available to you.

You should also read lots and lots of positive birth stories.

You can find loads on mum forums and communities online. Be careful though to avoid the negative stories as they would do your mind no good!

Readers Also Love: The 5 Best Antenatal Classes on Youtube

#3. Hypnobirthing and birth affirmations

Gosh! I can’t begin to explain the role hypnobirthing played in my births.

Hypnobirthing was so instrumental to me being calm when things were going haywire with my first.

It massively helped me and made me so confident to give birth.

It was also the key to my having an unmedicated birth with my second.

Hypnobirthing is “a method of managing pain and anxiety during childbirth, involving various therapeutic relaxation techniques, such as deep breathing and visualization”. Source

I bought a hypnobirthing book during my first pregnancy and watched several youtube videos about hypnobirthing techniques and it helped me see birth in a better, different light.

I saw birth as this natural process our bodies are made for and that relaxing instead of tensing helped to make labour better overall.

Hypnobirthing is also great for helping you if you are scared of labour.

Here are a few good books to get you started on hypnobirthing.

Hypnobirthing: practical ways to make your birth better by Siobhan Miller
The hypnobirthing book by Katharine Graves

Hypnobirthing uses birth affirmations. I did this more actively when I was in early labour with my second baby.

I kept repeating words like, “ I am confident”, “my baby is safe, I am safe”, “My birth is safe and easy” while in the shower to help my surges (a counter word for contractions).

These affirmations helped me have the most amazing, empowering, unmedicated, positive second birth story. It was a much quicker labour – 8 hours in total and I gave birth 40 minutes into arriving at the hospital. So quick that my husband missed it! ( I thought I would be there for hours, lol)

Here’s my favourite birth affirmations playlist. You can get it on Spotify or Apple iTunes as well.

If you are still sceptical about hypnobirthing, I can understand. I was at first. I would encourage you to check it out though, you never know.

Here’s a FREE online hypnobirthing class to check out to see if hypnobirthing is for you.

#4. Birth partner support

positive induction stories - dad's support

This point right here is soooo vital to you having an amazing birth.

Whoever your birth partner is – spouse, mum, sister, friend – make sure that they know HOW you want to be supported during your baby’s birth.

There are several ways a birth partner can help you have the birth you desire. Unfortunately, many partners are clueless about what to do to help during labour.

Here’s a post on 25 practical ways your birth partner can help you during labour to get you started.

Also, make sure to download the labour cards below. They are a great cheat sheet in case your husband forgets what to do in the heat of the moment.

This FREE prenatal course for couples taught by an L&D nurse is great for helping your birth partner know the ways and positions to help you when in labour.

#5. Choose your birth hospital carefully

Before birth, I would encourage you to do thorough research on the hospital you plan to use.

Jump into mummy forums online, ask questions and go online to read about your birth hospital.

Read reviews and watch for things like their postnatal care as well. Go for hospital tours or watch the hospital tours online.

Some hospitals have bad reputations for not treating their patients excellently. It’s better to avoid such so you don’t have a negative experience.

#6. Learn about breastfeeding

If you plan on breastfeeding, read on.

Breastfeeding is not a part of the birth process but it will happen very soon afterwards that its success or not may taint your experience of labour.

Breastfeeding is natural but it doesn’t come naturally for many women.

Taking a breastfeeding course will help you prepare for breastfeeding before your baby arrives.

Save yourself the hassle of wondering what is going on by learning about how to get your baby to latch, what a good latch looks and feels like, breastfeeding problems and how breastmilk is produced.

I recommend you take a good breastfeeding course. This FREE breastfeeding course is a great way to get you started on a successful breastfeeding journey.

If you prefer reading, here are some good breastfeeding books to consider stocking up on before your baby arrives.

The nursing mother’s companion
Ina May’s guide to breastfeeding
The womanly art of breastfeeding

#7. Prayers

As a Christian, prayers played a huge role in helping me enjoy the most incredible birth experiences both times.

Knowing that God was in control the entire time was reassuring. Knowing that He hears my prayers and as a loving father, He wants the best for me was calming.

If you are a Christian, can I encourage you to commit your birth to God and trust that He will help you and strengthen you?

Do NOT fear, you are not alone. God is with you and for you!

Conclusion,

I hope you’ve found this post helpful. I believe if you do these 7 things, you would have a positive birth story, no matter the type of birth you have.